Yes ladies and gents, this week I’m tackling the age old question of happiness. That pesky little thing that comes up in every aspect of our lives – our jobs, the bank account, our personal relationships, romance, co-workers, family, health – just everything!
A note, however, this video is not for the faint at heart. It may push you to want to take responsibility for your life, in which case I did my job
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After working in career consulting, recruiting and human resources I’ve noticed that half the people I interview are pretty damn miserable. They’ve blamed outward circumstances for their problems, bring baggage to job interviews, dealt with broken marriages, blew through all their money, got laid off, had to deal with medical issues, and bring an overall crappy mood into the room.
Now, don’t get me wrong. I’m pretty sympathetic toward people with issues – hell, we’ve all got them! Life isn’t perfect, people! What bothers me is when they let the inner nastiness determine how they react to life’s curve balls. This nastiness then projects outward causing them to lose their jobs, fail at relationships, hurt people, create addictive behavior, bomb job interviews, take on insurmountable amounts of debt, and chase things outside of themselves in an attempt to find happiness.
They come into the office thinking that if they get that one awesome job all their problems will be solved. Here’s a newsflash: if you bring a crappy attitude to the job your problems aren’t over. In fact, they will either continue or get worse. If you can’t stay satisfied at one job over your attitude what makes you think the next job will be any different?
And the same applies for everything else. If you can’t manage your money making 38k what makes you think you can manage it when you make 50k? If you can’t forgive an ex what makes you think the next guy is going to be any better? If you can’t get off your butt and go to the gym how are you supposed to get fit?
On the other hand, there are those people I interview who are an absolute joy to meet. Even if we can’t find them a job or provide much consultation, they bring this awesome energy into the room. They don’t necessarily have a ton of money, a nice car and a hot relationship. In fact, these people have gone through many of the same hardships as those I’ve previously mentioned -if not worse! The difference is in their attitude. They have already realized that clawing, manipulating and complaining won’t make situations any better. They know they are the co-creators of their own lives. They know that life can be lived with ease.
Is it genetics? Are some people just born happier than others? No. Some people just learn early on how to roll with the punches and stay positive. And more people are starting realize that their internal state will make a world of difference as they go about living their lives.
The moral of the story? Stop being such a cranky pants. Stop chasing things outside of yourself for happiness. Work on the inside and the outside will start figuring itself out.