As individuals and as a society we have a pretty big mental shit-storm when it comes to the topic of money. It’s not totally our faults. We definitely picked up some lack mentality from our parents and constant news of impending economic doom certainly doesn’t help.
This often times stops us from creating the life we want for ourselves.
We think we can’t possibly start a business during an economic downturn.
We believe we can’t invest in ourselves, our well-being and our evolution.
We think we can’t ask for a raise or get a new job because it’s not available to us.
We feel constrained, constricted, anxious and extremely fearful when it comes to the topic of money.
Yet even in the worst of circumstances there are people who are thriving financially. There are people starting successful businesses, making more money, working cool jobs and living the lives they actually want.
Truth be told, it was my willingness to say “There’s gotta be a better way” back when I couldn’t find a job in 2010 which led me to freelance writing and now running my own business full-time.
In a weird way, it was the ability to believe in possibility even when I didn’t totally see it which led me to getting my finances in order, starting a business and making more money.
Some people have this as a part of their nature. Those are the ones you see killing it no matter what is going on economically.
What’s up with that?
Simply put they changed their perception of making and managing money.
This is something I’ve certainly had to get used to and it’s something I help coaching clients deal with all the time. To be honest it’s a daily practice to move into a more abundant mentality when it comes to money – but it is possible and it works!
One of my favorite exercises and a favorite of most of clients is to GO ON A DATE WITH YOUR BUDGET!
Check out the video below for exactly what I mean.
Why You Want to Go On a Date With Your Budget
Unless we actually know what’s going on with our finances, we won’t be able to fix them. You need to know where you stand in order for you to take steps toward where you want to go.
The problem is most people are afraid of actually looking at the numbers. Budgeting sounds like a drag or perhaps we don’t want to face reality if we’ve gotten ourselves into a bad situation.
Furthermore, because we live in a society that also puts a high value on careers, money and owning stuff money is also very closely tied with our own feelings of self-worth. So one may be tempted to (falsely) think that if we can’t get it together financially than we ourselves are not worthy. This may cause individuals to avoid their finances because they don’t want to deal with uncomfortable feelings.
Of course, we can’t go through life avoiding our money. We have to eventually face it once and for all. Not only that, but you must cultivate a relationship with your finances for the rest of your life. Your financial problems don’t magically disappear if you win the lottery because you would still have to manage money properly.
Getting clear on the numbers also helps us figure out what steps are necessary in order for us to reach our next goals. For example, if you want to quit your job to run your own business you’ll need to know exactly how much money your business needs to make in order to make that happen.
In fact, it wasn’t until I got clear about my financial situation and my financial goals that I was able to start making any sort of progress in running a business or meeting some financial milestones.
- I was able to save $5,000 in an emergency fund in less than a year because I got clear on what I wanted and how to make it happen.
- I was able to double my business revenue because I got clear on the kind of money I wanted to make and how to get it.
- I was able to start saving for my own place because I got clear on how much money I needed to move.
- I was able to visit Mexico, The Bahamas, St. Thomas, St. Maarten and San Diego in 2016 because I knew how much I needed to earn and save to travel.
When you have this kind of clarity, you can more easily take the necessary actions to improve your financial life and meet your goals.
But you can’t get there without first taking inventory of where you currently are in your life. That’s why it’s so important to go on a date with your budget.
How to Go On a Date With Your Budget
Step 1: Set Aside a Specific Time
Because the topic of money can be very uncomfortable for people, I often times suggest that they set aside a specific time slot to dedicate to this exercise. Tell whoever you live with that you are to be undisturbed during this time and put it on your Google Calendar.
Step 2: Set Up the Room
The next step to going on a date with your budget is to set up the room. You’ll want to create a relaxing atmosphere to help you move through any uncomfortable feelings you may have while looking at your finances. Hang up a “Do Not Disturb Sign”, light some candles, play some music, grab some chocolate and pour yourself some wine – just like you would if you were spending some quality alone time with your honey.
Step 3: Dive In
This is the part where you fire up Mint.com, bust out your credit card bills and open up the bank accounts to do your budgeting. Everyone has a different way of budgeting so this is entirely dependent on what works for you. If you need some guidance, check out this blog post called The 5 Step Guide to Decluttering Your Finances For Good.
Final Thoughts
This is just one of the many ways to begin associating money with good feelings so that we can begin to cultivate a better relationship with our finances. For more on this topic feel free to check out my Amazon best-selling book, Make Money Your Honey.
